One Liners

I hate it when people point to their wrists to ask for the time !!
I mean, seriously, do I point to my crotch when I need a bathtroom?!?!
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Pappu did not go to school one day. The next day when the teacher asked him why, he said, ''Our cow was on heat, so I had to take her to the Bull.''
''How disgusting! I'm sure your father could have done that.''
''No ma'm, he couldn't have. It has to be the Bull.''
***
Ever wondered why A, B, C, D, E and F are used for bra sizes?
A for Almost boobs
B for Barely there
C for Can do
D for Damn good
E for Enormous and F for Fake
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Did you hear about the blonde man who had 8 vasectomies? He had to.... his wife kept getting pregnant.
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An old maid was held up in a dark alley. She explained she had no money, but the robber insisted that it must be in her bra, or in her panties and started feeling around.
''I told you I haven't got any money,'' the spinster said, ''but if you keep doing that, I'll write you a check.''
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Height of irritation: Hanging from a cliff with an ant on your balls.
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The difference between your girlfriend and you wife: Your girlfriend touches your hair, your c*ck stands! Your wife touches your c*ck, your hair stands!
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Husband was in pain as a honeybee bite at his penis, wife pray o god please take the pain away but leave the swelling.
***
A young couple on the brink of divorce decided to visit a marriage counselor. The counselor asked the wife about the problem.
''My husband suffers from premature ejaculation,'' she said.
''Is this true?'' the counselor asked, turning to the husband.
''Well, not exactly,'' he replied. ''She's the one who suffers, not me.''
***
A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms. He replies, ''Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?''
She responds, ''No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?''

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