Miscellaneous Jokes

31. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.


32. Women like silent men...they think they're listening.


33. Men are from earth, and women are from earth...just learn to accept it.


34. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.


35. Do pediatricians play miniature golf?


36. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?


37. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?


38. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?


39. If God dropped acid, would he see people?


40. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?


41. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?


42. If your work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?


43. If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?


44. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done...failed or succeeded?


45. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

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