Travel Jokes

'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was p*ssed.


He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.


Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks


I have a good mind to scr*p the whole works!


I've busted my as* for d*mn near a year,


Instead of Thanks Santa'--what do I hear?


The old lady girls cause I work late at night


The elves want more money-the reindeer all fight.


Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids


Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS


And just when I thought that things would get better


Those a**holes from the IRS sent me a letter,


They say I owe taxes--if that ain't d*mn funny


Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?


And the kids these days--they all are the pits


They want the impossible--Those mean little


I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds


Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads


I made a ton of yo yo's -- NO request for them,


They want computers and robots...they think I'm IBM!


Flying through the air...dodging the trees


Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees


I'm quitting this job...there's just no enjoyment


I'll sit on my fat as* and draw unemployment.


There's no Christmas this year...now you know the reason,


I found me a blonde. I'm going SOUTH for the season!

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