Men & Women Jokes
50 More Reasons It's Great To Be A Guy!
51) Foreplay is optional.
52) Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.
53) Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into a room.
54) You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.
55) You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader's coming by.
56) You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid.
57) Car mechanics tell you the truth.
58) You don't give a rat's b*tt if anyone notices your new haircut.
59) You can quietly watch a game with you buddy for hours without ever thinking He must be mad at me.
60) The world is your urinal.
61) You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover's about to leave you.
62) You get to jump up and slap stuff.
63) Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
64) One mood, all the time
65) You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him.
66) You never have to drive on to another gas station because this one's just too skeevy.
67) you know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
68) You can sit with you knees apart no matter what you're wearing.
69) Same work...more pay!
70) Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.
71) You don't have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment.
72) Wedding dress: USD2,000; tuxedo rental:USD75.
73) You don't care if someone's talking about you behind you back.
74) With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the Earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory.
75) You don't mooch off others' desserts.
76) If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
77) The remote control is yours and yours alone.
78) People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
79) ESPN's SportsCenter.
80) You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
81) Bachelor parties whomp b*tt over bridal showers.
82) You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.
83) You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.
84) You needn't pretend you're Freshening up to go to the bathroom.
85) If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he won't tell your other friends you've changed.
86) Someday you'll be a dirty old man.
87) You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase Screw it.
88) If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong buddies.
89) Princess Di's death was just another obituary.
90) The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
91) You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood.
92) You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.
93) If something mechanical doesn't work, you can bash it with a hammer or throw it across the room.
94) New shoes don't blister, cut, and mangle your feet.
95) p*rn movies are designed with your mind in mind.
96) You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.
97) Not liking a person doesn't preclude having great sex with them.
98) Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: So...notice anything different?
99) Baywatch
100) There's always a game on somewhere.
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